Anatomy lesson

So we usually try to watch each triple crown race and the kids always divide up the horses to see which one wins.  Caroline got really into it this year and kept asking which horses were hers and what place they came in.  Fast forward to the presidential election, which Carla and I apparently referred to as a race.  We were discussing it during breakfast the morning after, and Caroline chimed in, "Is Barack Obama my horse?"

I was explaining to her that I'm a man and she's a girl and she said, "No, you're a boy and I'm a girl.  You don't have a hat on.  That means you're not a man."

Caroline:  I love pears.  Pears are my favorite apples.

Caroline, explaining that Uncle Kyle and Aunt Keely's dog sniffs everything:  Murphy smurfed a lot of stuff.

Caroline, grabbing my bare chest and apparently informing me that I need to work pecks a little more:  Your pwivates are wiggwy.  (So please, if Caroline tells you that her daddy's privates are wiggly, know that she's just talking about my moobs.)

And one from Anderson yesterday:  Is today the twenty-oneth?

Fuzzy babies

Caroline on how to take care of her baby dolls:  Sometimes when they get a little fuzzy you just pat their back like this and then they don’t get fuzzy anymore.

Caroline:  I really like dream lights.

Me:  Oh yeah?  Maybe you can ask Santa Claus for one for Christmas.

Caroline:  I don’t like him, but I do ask him for presents.

Caroline, when walking into the bathroom:  I’m gonna lock the door so you can’t see my privacy, dad.

Caroline, telling me what she just watched on TV:  Scooby Doo and the Vampirates.

I walked in when everyone was bowing their heads for prayer before a dinner of delicious chicken soup the other night and they were going around the table:

Walker:  Please be with Victor and his mom [Victor is a little boy we’re praying for]

Carla:  Ellie?

Ellie:  Please be with Victor and his mom and help them get the food they need.

Carla:  Anderson?
Anderson:  Please be with Victor and help him get medicine when he’s sick.

Carla:  Caroline?

Caroline:  Mommy, my hair is wet from my soup!

Anderson, randomly:  Why isn’t it Monsday like Tuesday and Wednesday?  It should be Monsday.

We drove by a giant inflatable Brutus at a car dealership and Caroline noticed it.

Caroline:  Dad, it’s Brutus, just like on Anderson’s hat!

Me:  Yep, Brutus the Buckeye.

Caroline, matter-of-fact:  Butt is not a nice word, but we can call him Brutus the Butt Guy.

Earring mittens

So just like Ellie, Caroline got her ears pierced for her 3rd birthday.  I'll let you decide who did better:

Yeah, we're pretty sure that was the same teddy bear so, gross.  Anyway, Caroline refused to cry but she was pretty offended that those girls would do that to her.  As one of the assaulters was putting on her latex gloves, Caroline looked at me and said, "Are those her earring mittens?"

Bs and Ps are still a little tough for her.  She still says "pecause" and she still calls her bath robe a rope.  The other day she also said that she doesn't like ketchup or "bustard".  She does, however, like to eat a "vitium" to stay healthy.

Ellie's starting to rub off on her, too, because she suddenly has a very keen fashion sense.  One night she said, "Dad, that jammy shirt is not a jammy shirt.  It's a clothes shirt."

Bubble Cheeks

Caroline's recap of Bob and Brittani's wedding reception:  Mom, at the weal wecetion, your face was like this (grimaces) and dad's face was like this (smiles) and you had a dress on and dad had a like a fancy shirt on then you were dancing with both hands and people were dancing like crazy and daddy loves you and he likes you and when the dance was over he gave you a big hug.

Caroline:  Mom, does God and Jesus have bubbles on their cheeks like Santa Claus?  You know, those things on their cheeks like when daddy uses his shaver?

Caroline, in the middle of the night after waking up with cold:  I have yucky slobber coming out my nose!

Caroline, after Anderson hit her:  Dad, Anderson hurt me.  He doesn't get Pwigewees!  (She was trying to say privileges).

Caroline, watching me replace the batteries in her camera:  My camera works after you scwoove it with your screwdriver.

Anderson, watching a commercial on TV:  Mom, Stompies come with a sixty day dollar back!

Also, Anderson was a dancing maniac at the wedding reception.  I knew he had energy but I didn't know he had that much!  If we ever get our hands on the video, we'll post it here or on Facebook.  Anderson, Ellie, and Walker all did a really nice job at the ceremony and the reception.  We partied 'till Ellie made a bed for herself out of some chairs and went to sleep, then Walker asked me to take him to the car so he could sleep there while we finished the reception.  Anderson was still dancing, though.  Bob and Brittani did pretty well too.

Status update #@winkyfaceemoticon

Caroline, marching in place:  Mom, Ellie said Left Right Left Right and I go hup two fwee four!
Carla:  Oh, you're marching in place.
Caroline:  No, this is marching in place [marches in place], this is stomping [marches in place], and this is hup two fwee four [marches in place].

I grilled a pineapple yesterday to go with dinner.  Walker walked in and said, "This chicken looks disgusting!"

Caroline was watching me shave this morning and said, "Dad, kids can't touch your sharp thing or it will turn into a shark and bite them like a shark.  Or it will turn into a shark or a snake or a cow."

Also, a while ago she was watching me shave (MY FACE!) and she got "beard" and "whiskers" mixed up and said, "Dad, are you shaving your beavers?"

She's also been potty trained for a while now.  Pretty much did that on her own. She also still says Mangoldoodw for Magnadoodle.

Ellie's losing teeth left and right and becoming a pretty good little piano player.  She can flash a pretty nasty attitude once in a while but she's usually a sweetheart.  Except for when she's being a tattletale, which is a lot.

Anderson's still violent but he's the most generous, selfless kid I've ever known.  He shares or gives away anything without reservation just because he knows it'll make someone happy.  Then he kicks them.  We're thinking of putting him in Tae Kwon Do when soccer's over.

Walker's just doing his thing, playing soccer and baseball and being completely consumed with sports of any kind.  The Olympics was a pretty big event in our house this year.  He's the opposite of Anderson in that he thinks the world revolves around him but he is for the most part a decent human being.

Quick Quotes

Anderson was having a snack of vegetables one night this week and he walked over to me with his celery:  Technical Dad, I want peanut butter on these.

Caroline:  Dad, where is Ellie's purple purse are is?

Not sure if I ever wrote this but Caroline says "ayms" for arms and "nighkdown" for nightgown.

Carla tried a new recipe with the kids and they voiced their displeasure before trying it.  After they all finally tried it and liked it, Carla said, "See?  Maybe next time I make something new, you can try it instead of freaking out."
Caroline's reply:  I'm not freakin' out.  I'm freakin' good.
Anderson:  Do you mean like freaking out good or freaking out bad?
Caroline:  No, I'm just freakin' good.

The backup dad

We finally saw some offense when we went up to an Indians game!  12-3, 2 3-run home runs.  The only problem was that it was very hot.  Oh well, the shade eventually found us and made it bearable.  Also, it sure is nice that the Pro has low-carb popcorn, low-carb orange crush, and low-carb lemonade.  And we stopped at Danny Boys on the way home for low-carb deep-dish pizza and low-carb rat pack red.  Then we watched the real fireworks show in the sky with some friends and it never really even rained on us.  And no one threw up, so good day.

Carla explained the idea of a stepfather to Anderson and Ellie because someone on their team has one.  I don't know the kids name.  Let's go with Elmer.  A few days later Carla called Elmer's step-dad his dad and Anderson said, "No, that's not his dad.  That's his backup dad."

Also, we bought brown eggs and when Anderson saw them he said, "Are those chocolate eggs?"

Puke and Polkanuts

What is it about throwing up that makes me want to update the blog?  It hit Friday night.  I was meeting Carla at the softball game she was subbing in but she had to pull over for Ellie on their way.  Ellie did her thing on the side of the road and I switched vehicles with Carla to take them home.  We had planned on staying to make fun of her a little before took them all home but Ellie changed those plans.  So we got about halfway home and I had to pull over for Walker.  Same deal.  When we got home they both felt a little better but that was short-lived.  They each called Ralph at least 8 more times that night, so much that blood vessels broke in Ellie's face.  Walker was in his bed, woke up, called me frantically, and told me more was coming.  I told him to take the the bucket with him to the bathroom in case he didn't make it.  Well, he grabbed the bucket, ran into the bathroom, set the bucket beside the toilet, and puked in the bucket.  After that Walker and Ellie were like clockwork, every 20 minutes.  They each would run to a bathroom and I just directed traffic, like "NO NO, you're brother's in that one!  Go to the other one!  Hurry!"  Caroline woke up sometime around 10:00 and told me her belly hurt.  I knew what was coming so I took her downstairs and put another bucket beside her.  She tried to use it but was unproductive, "Dad, my frow up won't work."  Well, eventually it worked, but only once, and she hit the bucket like a pro.  Carla had finally gotten home from her softball double-header that had been delayed by a storm for an hour (!) by then, so she took over and I went to bed.  She said things finally settled down by about 2 am.  Saturday, everyone was perfectly fine all day and we thought maybe Anderson and the parents had gotten lucky.  Well, Carla felt lousy for an hour but she was probably more tired than anything else.  After church today we took the little 2 out to lunch and shopping while the big 2 were at gma and gpa's.  After being perfectly fine at church and lunch, Anderson finally started feeling sick at the store.  I took him out to the van and he laid in there until Carla and Caroline came out.  We were on the road for about 90 seconds when I had to pull over for Anderson.  Fortunately, it looks like he had the one-and-done flu like Gracie instead of the twelve times in six hours flu like the other 2.

OK, enough of that, here's some things they've been saying lately.

Caroline, running through the kitchen, stops and laughs:  Haha, I was run-tooting.

Anderson, arguing with me when I told him we were turning Amish so he couldn't watch TV or play WII:  No!  We love God and Jesus!  We're not Amish!

Ellie, just being her inquisitive self:  Mom, why aren't spaghetti noodle tank tops OK to wear to school?

Caroline, showing me something that had dots on it, I forget what:  See, dad?  The one with the Polkanuts on it.

Caroline recently informed us that she doesn't like "Ice Kwispies".

Also we went on two vacations.  Also Steph had three babies.

Quick weekend update

Friday
I picked up a pig (well, pieces of a pig) from the butcher.
We had Kyle and Keely and the girls over for cheeseburgers.
Kyle and Dad and I went to the church to get it ready for the musical.
Kyle and Keely left and then Keely came back and worked on getting ready for Walker's party (see below) with Carla 'till God-knows-when-o'clock.

Saturday
Walker and I had baseball at 8.
Ellie had choir practice from 10 to 1.
Anderson had ice skating at 1ish and Ellie had to miss.  Thankfully, Lisa was able to take him.
I had a leftover cheeseburger for lunch.
Walker had a birthday party at the bowling alley at 2:30.  He had a giant cheeseburger cake that you probably saw pictures of on Carla's Facebook.  Unfortunately, it tasted nothing like cheeseburgers.  Also, there were 12 very loud 8-year-old boys there in a very small room.  They had fun and I had a headache.
Then we went and got cheeseburgers for supper.
Caroline, well, I kind of lost track of her.  I think she was at Grandma's.

Sunday
Getting ready for church, Anderson had socks that were the same color but didn't match otherwise.
Me:  Are you sure those are the socks you want to wear?
Anderson:  Heck yeah!  I don't care if they're mitch-matched on the bottom.

Ellie had her musical and did an excellent job on her solo. 
We went to lunch on the way to a going away party for a coworker of mine.  He's going away.
Then we went to the Grandma and Papa's for supper and fun.

More from Caroline

Caroline:  I frowed up on my shirt!
Carla:  What!?
Caroline:  I frowed up on my shirt!
Carla:  When?
Caroline:  Absolutely.
Carla:  No... when?
Caroline:  Sixty-five.

That one's a mystery.  She hadn't even really frowed up on her shirt.

Ouch, man

Caroline, indignant at Carla for peeling her banana:  Don't take the wrapper off my banana!

Ellie to Carla, while Walker and Anderson were acting like boys:  Do you think my kids are gonna act like that?
Carla:  Probably
Ellie:  I don't want them to.
Carla:  Yeah, well, I don't want Walker and Anderson to act like that, but they still do.
Ellie:  Do you think I'll do a better job raising them?

Our day in brief, but not in briefs

So far today:
Carla ran at 6:30, got home at 8, and started getting ready for Steph's baby shower.  She's having triplets by the way.  No big deal.
I worked out from 9-11.
I took Ellie to choir at 12.
Carla took Walker to a friend's house at 12:30 so they could take him to soccer @ 2, then went to the baby shower.
I picked up Ellie from choir at 12:40 (80 minutes early) to take her and Anderson to ice skating.
I dropped Ellie off at the baby shower at 2:10 and drove to Walker's soccer game with Anderson.  We of course made our customary post-ice skating stop at DD for coffee and a doughnut for Ander.  He fell asleep in the car for 5 minutes but woke up enough to run around with the other kids at soccer.
After soccer, I took the boys to Cici's for the worst pizza I've ever had.  The kids love it, though, so I was stuck.  We owed it to Anderson and we were right there so I figured I'd get it over with.

So to summarize, Anderson has been to church, ice skating, Dunkin Donuts, soccer, and Cicis.  He wore two pairs of socks and no underwear.

Ellie the mechanic and Tom the Leprechaun

Anderson came in the house yesterday yelling, "Something bad is happening out here!"  I ran out because I thought someone was hurt.  It turns out that he was just telling on himself.  Ellie followed him in holding one of my wrenches and said, "Anderson was using your screwdriver on Caroline's bike and he was screwing one of the nozzles on her training wheels and now her training wheel is all loose!"

Carla, to Caroline:  Tell dad what we did.
Caroline:  Dad, what we did!

Carla, to Caroline:  Ask dad how his day at church was.
Caroline:  Dad, how was church at day was?

Every year on St. Patrick's Day, our house gets invaded by a mischievous leprechaun named Tricky Tom.  Every year we try to catch him but he always seems to evade our traps.  We've trapped his pants a couple of times but he apparently doesn't mind leaving them behind as long as he still has his gold.  Well, last night we were devising our trap and we had this little conversation.
Me:  So, what are we going to do with the leprechaun if we actually catch him?
Ellie:  I . . . don't know.
Anderson:  Cut him in half and eat the ham?
All:  . . .
Me, to Anderson:  You don't actually know what a leprechaun is, do you?
Anderson:  Nope.

So later I set up what I thought would be a good trap.  I leaned the vacuum hose against the sweeper so it was right against the switch.  I showed the kids that if we put the bait (our gold) in the right spot, Tom would step on the switch and get sucked into the hose.  I demonstrated with a plush toy that he'd only go a little way into the hose, not get sucked into the canister.  Everyone thought that was a great idea except for Anderson, who started crying really hard because he thought that might hurt him.  I guess cutting him in half would have been OK, though.  In either case, we had to move on to plan B.  Plan B was a simple snare made of fishing line thrown over our dining room light.  We put gold in the middle of the slip knot and tied the other end to the sweeper, which was tipped slightly.  As successfully demonstrated with the same plush doll, when Tom grabbed for the gold, the sweeper would fall over and the knot would tighten around his ankles and pull him into the air, trapping him for us to interrogate in the morning.  (The kids absolutely cracked up when they saw their stuffed Alvin swinging upside down in the air).  Well, once again we came up empty handed, but we are up one pair of leprechaun pants.  He also left some little treats for the kids and once again turned our milk green.

When I was tucking the kids in we were still talking about what to do with Tom if we caught him.
Ellie:  If we catch him, which one of us gets to hold him?
Me:  Umm, I think he'll run away as soon as we cut him down and try to hold him.
Anderson, very deep in thought:  Maybe we should talk to him before we cut him down.  Leprechauns are magic, though.  I . . . don't think they talk very much.

Walker still says funny stuff now and then

Carla, to me, in Walker's presence:  Walker helped me make those hamburgers.  'Cause he knows that a kitchen isn't just for women, right Walker?
Walker shrugs.
Carla, trying to get Walker to remember something they must have rehearsed:  Riiiight, Walker?  And what are you going to do someday when you're married?
Walker:  Watch TV, I guess.
Carla:  In the kitchen.
Walker:  Yeah, we'll have a TV in the kitchen.

Walker:  Oh, look at that flag!  I love the Italy flag.  The Italy flag is definitely my favorite.

Our baphtub needs new battewies

That's what Caroline told me last night before her bath.  Also, as I was chasing her up the stairs on the way to the bathtub, she said, "Don't get me dad.  Be a good boy."  Then she just looked at me for a minute like she couldn't trust me and said, "Be a good boy.  Dad, walk up the steps on your feet like Walker do."

Also she was mad this morning because Anderson wouldn't give her the "toofaste" and last night she yelled at him because he was playing with her "Mangoldoodle".

And Anderson still says "bessert".

My Loves

Things I love about my kids . . .
 Anderson 
-the way he twirls his hair when he sleeps
-when he climbs up on my lap and twirls my hair when we snuggle
- his generosity - he will share absolutely anything if he knows it will make them happy, even if it's last m&m, only quarter, or favorite toy
-his wild and crazy imagination

Caroline
-the cute way she looks at me when she's about to do something naughty
-when she says she doesn't want to go to bed, then practically leaps out of my arms into her crib with her favorite blankies and snuggies
-when she asks me if I can "up her"
-her love of books

Walker
-his internal alarm clock - he's an early bird just like his mom and dad :)
-the sweet-big-brother-way he snuggles with Caroline and reads book to her and the way he tells Anderson how proud he is that he had a good day at preschool or made good choices in Sunday School
-his crazy sarcastic sense of humor and playfulness
-his competitive nature
-his maturity level when it comes to being sensible and realistic

Ellie
-her exquisite sense of style
-the way she thinks of others and their feelings
-her mad organizational skills
-her gift for music and singing - I'm glad someone in our family got it ;)

There are so many more.  These are just the few I could think of in the last few minutes.  Kurt and I are so blessed by all 4 of them!

Snack Scrapple Pop

That's what Ellie thought Rice Crispies say.

Let's see, some stuff about Caroline.
Yesterday she came down in the morning, asked for a juice box, drank it all, then laid face-down on the kitchen floor and fell back to sleep.
She says "sanks" for thanks, "Humpty Humpty" for Humpty Dumpty, "pecause" for because and she likes to eat "ponatoes".
She doesn't like her build-a-bear bunny, Lilly, because it bit her on the leg once, but she loves Dora, Boots and carbohydrates.
Today she was sitting at the table saying, "punch, punch, punch!"  When I asked her what she was doing, she said "I punched my fruit snack."
She's excited about potty training and has been pretty successful so far.
She can still fit in the little cupboard on the bottom of our clock with the door shut.

Walker got his cast off on Thursday.  He's supposed to wear a splint for a while but he's back to normal other than that.

Anderson's been getting in trouble a lot at preschool lately, nothing too major, mostly from playing too rough.

If each team would have added a field goal, I would have hit my Super Bowl prediction dead on and would have made $0.

Maybe he'll invent the quintuple sow cow

Caroline and I saying prayers before bed:
Me:  Tell Jesus something you're thankful for, Gracie.
Caroline:  Jesus is not here.
Me:  Sure he is, he lives right here in your heart.
Caroline:  No, Jesus is not here.  He's in the car maybe.

Walker, as we were pulling into Bryan and Robin's:  Dad. OK.  Is Robin from Panama, or Costa Rica?

Walker, Ellie, and Anderson were playing in the backyard a couple of days ago and they came running in laughing and shouting, "Mom, mom, come quick!  There's a huge fat goose in our yard!"
It was the emu from the crazy farm down the road.

Anderson started ice skating lessons today.  On his way either to being a hockey player or shunned by his family.

Giants 24, Pats 20.

Daddy, can you spell my hand?

That's what Caroline says if she wants you to trace her hand on a piece of paper.  Then, if she wants to tear the picture out of the book, she says, "Dad, can I rip one?"  Also she can spell her name all by herself now, but just out loud, not pen to paper.  Still, she's two.  I'll take it. 

Also, I guess the other day she was coloring or something with Molly and she said, "Hey Molly, how's your day going with Uncle Andy?"  Nothing special there, just kind of cute.

Anderson's gonna be a great cop

Caroline:  Dad!  Anderson hit me!
Me:  Anderson, what happened?
Anderson:  We were just having a conversation.

Walker had good results from his most recent x-ray so he went back to school today to get his cast signed by all his friends, though there's little room left now that all his extended family has been by to see and sign him.  I signed on the part covering his bicep.  I told him I did it so he could make a muscle when he showed the girls where I signed, then I demonstrated what I meant.
Walker:  Whoa, Dad!  Can I feel your muscles?
Me (head swelling a little):  Sure buddy.
Walker, feeling said muscle:  Wow, Uncle Bob's muscles are way bigger than yours!
Me (head returning to normal size but feeling the need to defend myself):  Uh, I don't know, we're probably pretty close to the same.
Walker:  Yeah, well, that guy you're always looking up on the internet still has bigger muscles than you.
Embarrassing, especially if taken out of context, but I had to give him that one.

Oh, wow, 200th post.

Walker's arm

OK, so Walker broke his arm on Thursday morning in gym class by running into the wall during a race.  He broke both bones just above the wrist.  Carla took him to the ER and I met them there at about noon.  He was obviously in a lot of pain but he held it together pretty well for the nurses and stuff.  The ER doc ordered some morphine for him which got him feeling better pretty quick.  It also made him drift in and out of sleep a few times so that was good.  It was probably about 3 by the time the doctor had looked at the x-rays, gave us a scrip for what was basically children's Vicodin, and told us to follow up with an orthopedic doctor.  They had put his arm in a splint by then but it was far from good to go.  Fortunately we were able to follow up almost immediately and Walker was in "surgery" by 6.  They called it surgery because he was in the O.R. under anesthesia, but they didn't have to cut him open or anything (although the doc was afraid he'd have to put in a pin).  Walker woke up pretty slow but that was expected... it was after his bed time.  All in all, it went really well for what it could have been and we were home by about 9:30.  The main thing Walker complained about was actually being hungry.  He hadn't eaten since breakfast and he was starving but we wouldn't let him eat because we were thinking he might have to have anesthesia later.  That also meant that Carla and I didn't eat until he went into the O.R.  I ran down to the cafe and got us huge dinners to enjoy while we worried about our little guy.  Before we left the hospital, the nurse told us to give Walker crackers and chicken broth so he wouldn't get sick from the anesthesia.  Instead of all that he ate a double cheeseburger, chicken nuggets, and french fries.  Hey, he earned it, and he did not get sick.  He's doing well now, mainly resting up and watching football.

Carla asked Caroline to ask me to make her a protein shake before church on Sunday.
Caroline:  Will you make mommy a . . . bucka-chuck?
Carla:  No, say, will you make mommy a protein shake?
Caroline:  Will you make mommy a . . . purple shirt?

Caroline, to Carla, after I apparently refused to give her milk:  I want milk.  Daddy telled me no.  You don't say no to me.  You're a bad girl though.  Don't say no to me.  Mommy, I want you to go away.

Tonight I asked her if she wanted to sleep with her bunny, Lilly.  She said, "No, Wiwwee's bad.  She bit me on the leg."  I think she might have had a dream that she got attacked by her bunny.  Maybe she had just watched a horrendously unfunny British "comedy".

I was reading the kids stories from the epic novel Mainly Stuff the Kids Say tonight before bed and they were all telling me what their favorite parts were before prayers. Anderson continued to do so during prayers, so I told him he had to pray because he was interrupting.
Anderson:  Dear Jesus, My favorite part was when I said . . .